Category: Writers Block
Looking back on messages I sent you.
It occurs to me how different things are now.
I had so much respect for you.
So much love, so much trust.
You were almost like a sister to me.
I told you absolutely everything about me.
I let you into the deepest parts of me.
If I'd known how you'd repay me.
Maybe I'd have kept my mouth shut.
I'd have done so much differently.
I wouldn't have stayed with you on the phone for five hours,
Pouring my heart out to you and telling you my hardships.
If I'd have known what you'd do with my secrets,
I'd never have revealed them.
If I'd known the shit you'd say after leaving my house,
I'd have never allowed you to stay.
You could have stayed with your family and wallowed in your own drama and self
pity.
If I'd have known how much of a convenient friend I was to you,
I wouldn't have given so much of myself.
We wouldn't have had all those outings,
All those laughs,
All those amazing times.
If I'd known how you used things against me
I'd have never let you buy me food.
Ever.
It's funny to see how much I appreciated your friendship then.
I enjoyed your company and valued your opinion.
I know now that you didn't feel the same.
It's such a shame,
When you recognize the true colors of someone you once respected, loved, and
cared about.
I feel grateful,
That I know now,
But I wish,
So badly,
I had known then.